(Author's note: THIS IS NOT A SONIC.EXE STORY! I have edited it and made Sonic be more like a psycho rather then a gore-bathing demon.)
I'm really freaked out right now! I don't want to play any video game anymore. Especially not Sonic games. I'll tell you why:
I loved playing games related to Mario, but since all the Mario games I owned were either sold, finished or I was unable to continue with them. I was like: I like Sonic as well, so I'll give him some attention. I decided to pick up my old Gamecube and play one of my favorite Sonic games: Sonic Adventure. I booted it up and skipped to the title screen. See the picture above? That's what the title screen looked like. But there was weird music playing, it sounded like Slenderman's theme, but with no lyrics. I was like: WTF, but pressed start. (Why did I do that?) Every story had no completion at all, and Sonic's story wasn't selectable. Only Big, Knuckles, Amy, Tails and Gamma could be chosen from. Since Gamma was my favorite, I chose him. A cutscene started. It took place in what looked like Eggman's base, but in ruins. Some characters started talking, it went like this:
Gamma: "Who destroyed him? It was my job."
Random bystander: "I heard tales of a hedgehog doing this to him."
The camera zoomed in on what looked like Eggman's corpse.
Gamma: "Hedgehog? Does not compute."
Sonic's voice: "Well, does THIS compute, useless piece of scrap?"
Sonic appeared out of nowhere, running fast. He dind't look much diffrent, but he had a satanic smile, and his left eye was constantly twitching, like he was a psycho of some sort. What happened? Gamma turned around and said in a angry voice: "KILL! DESTROY!"
But Sonic spindashed right through him, splitting the poor Gamma in half. Sonic said mockingly: "Too bad. I'm too powerful for you all." He laughed like a maniac before the screen cut to black. I was back at the character select screen. I was creeped out. "Who the hell did this? Is this some stupid joke?" I said to myself, but I continued, selecting Big this time. Maybe his calm game play will get this creepy feeling out. Another cutscene, but it was the normal cutscene this time. But unfortunately, as soon as the level started, Big was in his house. That was interesting since you never get to walk around in his house normally. After "exploring" the hut, I tried to leave, but Sonic appeared again. Another cutscene triggered:
Big: "Hey Sonic. What's with the weird look? Did something happen?"
Sonic: "No. I'm just a psychol, that's all."
Big: "Huh, what?"
Sonic: "Yeah, and by the way, here's your friend."
Froggy was fully cut open, eyes gouched out, it almost made me throw up my lunch. Big was about to punch Sonic, but the screen cut to black and later showed an image of Big's body, half "Zombie-fied". His fishing hook was in his ear, and his bones were clearly shown. I felt terribly sorry for him, but I returned to the title screen. I put the controller down, fealing really depressed and creeped out. I thought: "What kind of sense does this make?" I took a rest, drank a Pepsi and ate Snickers and took a nap.
It was stupid of me, but I continued. When I started with Amy, only one thing was shown. Amy's head, eyes and other body parts were hanging around the words: GAME OVER! Sonic was smiling, enjoying what he did to the little fan girl.
I selected Tails. I was in Sky Chase act 1. Super Sonic flew by and landed on the left wing of the Tornado and Spindashed again. Tails started crashing. Then, Sonic appeared again, in front of the dead body of Tails. Laughing like a maniac, he ate Tails' corpse.
Only one option left: Knuckles. A cutscene happened yet again:
Sonic: "Hi Knuckles."
Knuckles: "What have you done to everybody?"
Sonic: "Those don't need to be here. You don't belong in this world either, Knuckles."
Knuckles: "Why not, you sadist?"
Sonic: "You all have been a pain in my life, and it's your fault that I'm a psycho now. I'm also hungry, so..."
Knuckles was killed with Sonic eating his entrails.
"YOU ARE NEXT. SEE YOU SOON!" Appeared on the screen. I was sick of this game and the console. I knew what to do. I grabbed my baseball bat and smacked it over and over. I threw it outside the window and went to bed. I had a nightmare. Sonic said: "Nothing can save you. You'll be mine." He smiled and I woke up. I started up my computer, and wrote this story. I don't know how long I'll be alive: but let me say you this:
Sonic is a demon. Don't encounter him, and play his evil games. You'll be fine.
I hope.
"YOU'RE TOO SLOW!"
Oh shit...
(Spindash sound effect)
{{by|Tjerk Hogewoning|wiki=spinpasta}}